Hearts on our sleeves
by ISmile4BTR
Summary: James and Kendall had been in love with each other since they were teenagers. But Kendall's parents never liked James, and the fact that their only son turned gay because of him. They were afraid of the little spoiled brat James breaking Kendall's heart. After all it seemed Kendall's parents were just about right. Time after time James only made mistakes ... /AU/mpreg/
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: all right. this is short preview of a story that i want to write... i don't know if it will be something but i thought i'd try.. so yeah. WARNING: i'm planning to make this story a MPREG fic. got it? this would be my first mpreg and i'm curious if i could actually do something good so yeah here we are.. if you don't like it then you are free to go i don't care too much.. **

**there aren't much information given to you in this first chapter but there will be shit going down soon so if you are interested hit follow .. ok? yeah. **

**thanks for your attention :) **

**now read!**

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**Chapter 1**

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The last thing he needed now was getting his blood pressure up too high, so Kendall breathed in and out deeply while speaking to Logan, his friend, on the phone. "Let's just cancel it, bro. I can't make it there. James has other plans. He fucking fucks up everything lately. I wanted it to be one of the best nights ever, you know. I'm too tired for his shit now. He's fucked this up. We cancel, okay?"

"Sure thing, Kendall. I'm sorry. I've been waiting this day since forever."

"I know, me too." Kendall lowered his voice. He didn't want James to hear any of this. "I'll just let things calm down. I'll try again a few weeks later."

They said their goodbyes and then Kendall put his head onto the table in front of him. It was tough for him to not cry.

"Who did you talk to?" James stood in the door.

Looking up Kendall was a little pale but James was at the moment too big of an asshole to notice it and worry about his boyfriend's well being. "No one."

"Yeah? To me it sounded like I just ruined some important plans with this no one." He didn't move, just stood firmly like he was a built in furniture in their house.

"Don't make shit up, James. You know what plans I had."

"I'm not sure anymore. You were going to get together with someone, weren't you?" Jealousy was a good friend of James'.

"Yeah. I was going to bring you to somewhere we usually don't go just so I can meet someone I don't want you to meet. Do you really think I'm that fucking stupid?"

"I don't think you are stupid." James sighed. "But I know well that if your family is there they could keep me busy while you busy yourself with someone else." He was so calm that it literally disturbed the hell out of Kendall.

"This must be a fucking joke!" Kendall stood pushing the chair aside and about to storm out of the kitchen. He'd had just about enough of James' insane ideas about him cheating.

James stared at his boyfriend speechless, unable to recognize just what he said that got Kendall so mad. "Now what are you even doing?" He grabbed Kendall's arm to stop him from leaving without an explanation.

"What am I doing?" Kendall whispered not losing eyecontact with James. "What ARE YOU doing?" He shouted into James' face. "I told you I wanted to go to _Roses _tonight, I told you it weeks ago! That's my fucking favorite place in the world and we never go there because it's not a place where the Mr. Fuck-Me-I'm-Making-Every-Decision-In-Our-Life James Diamond would go."

"Don't be so fucking emotional!" James let go of Kendall. "We could go anywhere else but why just there? What's in that place that makes you want to be there?! Is there a hot dude you want to fuck huh?!"

"Just my mother, you asshole! You know I've been looking for her for over ten years. I've finally found her but rather than helping me face the problems you choose to stay out of it. I fucking hate that in you!"

"Oh yeah?" James' anger grew. He hated when Kendall cursed at him.

"Oh yes!" Kendall groaned. "That place is fucking awesome but you don't ever want to make a fucking effort for us. Rather than that you just fucking make up shit and make me get out of every situation badly! We keep fighting because you're so fucking stubborn! I've never cheated on you! I love you! But you're being so stupid about us! I don't even know why we are together at all. You don't want our families to get together, you don't want us to be out in the open. You want to hide me from the world like I am a fucking mistake!"

"You're not a mistake, Kendall, shut the fuck up!" Having heard just enough James couldn't stop himself from pushing Kendall up the wall and kissing him strongly, in his own way letting him know just how much loved him and how much he couldn't live without him.

But Kendall moaning pushed James off of him. "Words mean nothing at the moment. Things have changed, James. We're not teenagers anymore, and our families would like it if we just were finally happy, this way or another."

"They don't like me." James turned away like he was ashamed. "They will never like me."

"I'm sure they like you if they see just how happy you make me." Kendall kept trying. "Please James, let's go there."

For a short moment Kendall thought he had convinced James. There was something in James' eyes that told Kendall he wanted to do it, but then his mouth said the opposite thing. "I can't."

"And just how do you imagine this relationship working in the future if you can't do this?" Kendall asked taking a step back from his boyfriend. Slowly moving towards the door he could already hear James' answer. _I don't know. _That was the only fucking thing James kept repeating. For Kendall it had been fine that way for a while, but it was time it had to stop. James couldn't always run. It was time for Kendall to run. So that may open up James' eyes. He was going to learn how freaking much it could break a person when someone was running from them all the time.

"I don't know."

"I thought so." Kendall sighed already in the door, ready to get out and not come back for a while. "Then it's unnecessary to keep trying. I don't even want to imagine a future like that anymore." With that Kendall quickly made it out of the house.

"Wait, Kendall!" James yelled but never made a move to come after him. _Words mean nothing. _Though it nearly broke Kendall's heart, he walked out on James and after jumping in to his car, he drove away.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: hi. first of all before i forget it as sadly most of the time, thanks to** _xScreamingFromBehindTheVeilx, the Kenamesrett, m-boos, Jenno2, 1234irrek _**and**_ Guest_**for following, favoriting, reviewing! I love you heaps! **

**Obviously if the plot doesn't turn out the way you guys are expecting it's free for anyone to stop reading. If you don't like it the way I want to write it then don't read it. Simple as that. But before you give up on it, give it more than a chapter worth chance... **

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**Chapter 2**

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He'd perfectly planned the whole thing out but James had to screw it up yet again. All Kendall wanted to do was punching his boyfriend straight across the face to hit some sense into that stubborn brain of his, but he had just walked out on him. He was tired of the never stopping arguments, he was tired of always being topped.

James needed to let the tight leash loosen up a bit, because Kendall now was certain if things between them were going to continue like this, he wasn't going to return that house.

All those years spent in couple therapy had been a waste of time and money. Both James and Kendall were more of the dominant type till the very day that they had met. Soon they'd fallen in love with each other and would have given up everything for one another.

For Kendall it never mattered that his parents disliked James. He'd always tell James to see past the hate because there was the way to happiness.

Kendall was only seventeen when he found out that his parents weren't his parents by blood. At first it shocked him, it would shock any person, but he had made it through the worst times with James on his side. After about a year what it had taken to get to know that his mother was alive, it had cost several more years to actually get any information about her whereabouts. Kendall couldn't have made it without James. James had the money and the connections to find her, while Kendall could only sit and wait for anything to come up. He wasn't sure he could ever thank his boyfriend enough for searching Jennifer.

Yes, James had made mistakes, but Kendall loved him anyways.

Only if he hadn't been such an idiot most of the time. It weren't the mistakes that would upset Kendall. No, not anymore. They never were, to be honest. Kendall had forgiven James for making up a scene about him cheating on Kendall, only so that way Kendall would have broken up with him and his family would have been happy. He could move past of James' upcoming need for running off. Kendall couldn't even keep track anymore how many times James had wanted to take off and never come back. He'd thought that would make things better for Kendall. Somehow Kendall every time could explain it to James that nothing would upset him more than him leaving. He could always make him stay. It was tiring, but it was worth it for Kendall.

And this was just one of the many things that James had been able to fuck up their relationship with.

_I should go back. To keep fighting as I always do. _

This was just what James wanted. Making Kendall leave. He'd tried several times, but Kendall was always strong enough to keep going.

Though there is a point when everyone's had enough of being strong.

And that time had come for Kendall too.

If James had thought that he was on top of this situation, he was wrong.

_It's all in my hands, baby. It's all up to me now. You think you successfully manipulated me into leaving you. Fine. It's not only me leaving. You'll not know it for a while_ _yet. _

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"This isn't exactly how it should be, Carlos." James hadn't had a calm minute since Kendall had left.

All he could do to stop himself from going after him was calling his best mate, Carlos. "You wanted this to be like it so live with it now. Dude, you know I love you, but what you've been doing to that guy past these years would have given anyone a serious heartache. You love him. He loves you. Why couldn't you just let him has his space in the relationship too? Why do you always have to top everyone when you are obviously not made for that?"

"Look, Carlos. You have no idea what's gone down here." His best friend was pretty much of a speaker of mind, but he didn't know a thing. James thought so.

"Yeah. Sorry. Forgot you were the king of all brains and no one can figure a thing out only you. Bullshit, James. You hear me? It's been going on for years now and you don't want to come anywhere close to Kendall's family because you're afraid of getting rejected again! But you know what? With not coming around you'll exactly get there again! It's turning the other way around than you thought it would. You fuck it up by not wanting to be in touch with them." The same speech happened every time when he had fought with Kendall, and James couldn't learn the lesson yet. "You don't understand how, right?" Carlos whispered.

James put himself down onto the couch. Kendall loved that couch. That was the first thing they had chosen to buy together. "He'll go to them for support with his broken heart. I broke it again and he runs there every time and they will think I'm a monster again."

"Correct."

"So what do I do?"

"Are you ready to meet them?"

"No." There wasn't the tiniest doubt, he wasn't at all ready. "They love Kendall. Even if he has turned out to like boys rather girls, they love him anyways. It's great. They are great people. But they hate me for pushing their one and only Kendall towards the "wrong" way."

"I can't tell you what to do then. You thought you were going to keep Kendall for the rest of your life without him trying to escape once he realizes that the whole thing is fucking unhealthy?"

"I wanted him to escape. But I never thought it was going to hurt so bad."

"You need him more than he needs you. You didn't even know it, did you?"

He let out a little snort. "Nope."

"So if you need him that much why can't you just go after him and take him back?"

"He wouldn't come." James was sure. James could always see it on Kendall's face when he'd had enough of something. And obviously tonight his boyfriend had just a little more than enough of him. "He's really tired of me. By now he realized just what I did and he's re-thinking everything. And he's acknowledging that I'll always be this way, and this time that realization will stop him from wanting me any more."

"You don't know that. He is probably going to stay away, but only to keep you on the edge. You've been controlling the relationship so far and he's had enough of that. It's not you he's had enough of, James. He wants to be the top for once. Leave him be, but not for too long."

"And just how long is enough?"

"I don't know that. But it would be the best if you just faced those demons of yours and let things be the way they are supposed to." Carlos did always know what to say. He'd always had the answer to every question. James couldn't ask for a better friend. Kendall had always been his friend too. But once you are in love with someone it's hard to call him a friend. He is your life. He should be.

Kendall was James' everything.

And he'd just lost him.


End file.
